Recent Blog Posts

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[WATCH] I Wanted to Die Last Week

There won’t ever be a time it’s not necessary to present diligent pleas to God—therefore, we must never grow weary in having to do so. We may get tired of facing affliction and storms, but we must never get tired of praying through them. Find out why when you watch this episode of Zara Talks.

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I Thought I Was Writing One Book, But God

Can I just tell you? I swore up and down (just the north Jerz in me, using my normal figure of speech to show how certain I was), that I was writing one novel. All the way up until the middle of 2017. I would look at my outline for It Came 2 Pass and feel like I had a mountain to climb—that I’d never be able to.

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I Needed to Write Today, But…

Gone are the days when I was a younger single woman, and had energy to type into the wee hours, thousands of words. I’m actually tired by the time sunset hits. So, even though I’m not naturally an “early bird,” this flesh will have to get beat into submission in order to get it done before sunrise.

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[WATCH] The Thing I Fear Has Come Upon Me

Did you know there’s a common root of our gripes with, and murmurings against, God? And that root is a specific sin too. In the book of Job, it may seem like his fear [Job 3:25-26] was the issue. However, we find out later, that very specific sin was what Job had to repent of, not fear. Find out what it is when you watch this episode of Zara Talks.

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[WATCH] I Don’t Believe In Jesus Anymore

The fight with unbelief usually springs from a pride within our own heart, so we must be adamant about asking God to search our heart, constantly. Otherwise we end up masking the real issue; pride. For many Christians, they pretend their zeal for God is driving them, when they’re really only after something they envy or covet (rooted in pride). That pride keeps us from relying on God’s understanding, which then prevents us from growing in faith. So, we succumb to unbelief.  WATCH now, to learn more.

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The Hairston’s 10-Year Vow Renewal

You heard their love story, you watched Zara find the dress, you rode along for the first taste-testing and you know about the “fake ring” story. Now, it’s finally time to see the actual 10-year vow renewal—and the week leading up to the big day! Watch it now.

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[WATCH] How to Set Goals

Plan your life with God—in a way that allows you to measure progress. I show you how using my goal worksheet to start you off in six life areas, and it includes my calendar measuring tool too! Grab your free resource to follow along with my instructions detailed in this episode of Zara Talks.

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[WATCH] Find Your Spiritual Gifts

Find out what spiritual gift(s) God has equipped you with—to serve His Body of believers—in this episode of Zara Talks. Make sure you watch this video in full before you take the test, otherwise, you may walk away with inaccurate results.

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[WATCH] Biblical Submission

Marriage can feel miserable when submission is taken out of context and enforced on either spouse. Learn how to practice submission when you watch “Biblical Submission,” on this episode of Zara Talks!

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[WATCH] Harmful Horoscopes

Find out why horoscopes are harmful to true believers, in this episode of Zara Talks. If you call yourself a “Christian,” you’ll definitely want to know why [horoscopes are harmful ] and what to do with this vital information.

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[WATCH] 15 Things to Do So You Don’t Have Sex

Studies show couples who have sex before they get married end up with less pleasurable sex lives compared to those who wait until marriage. Regardless of such useful information, it’s still a real struggle for many people. Usually it’s because they’re more focused on what they can’t do than what they can. So it’s good to know Biblical guidelines like those outlined in 1 Corinthians 7:32-35, but even better when it’s used as a tool to reinforce you positively.

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[WATCH] Before You Cheat

Find out how porn addiction and temptations of attention outside our marriage lead us to discover the power of confession, in this Zara Talks episode—which my husband dropped in on. I trust the stories and application suggestion at the end of the video will help you mature and grow your relationship or marriage.

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[WATCH] Do More!

Think like a “real one,” and then—let your behavior follow. I explain just what that means in this “Zara Talks” episode entitled “Do More!” Be sure to SHARE this video so you can help your friends and family too.

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[WATCH] “Thank You God!”

What was the last thing you thanked God for? How often do you thank Him? Did you know it is the will of God that we, His children and disciples of Christ, be thankful in all things? I offer a really simple tip that can help you do just that, in this video. Share it so you can help your friends and family too!

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[WATCH] Living With a Mental Disorder

It took me over 18 years before I finally got help with my mental disorder, and it only happened “by chance,” when I finally attempted the suicide I’d long dreamed about. Watch this video to learn more about my story, and how you can help your loved ones with a similar struggle. May the lies you believe about mental health issues be uprooted!

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[WATCH] Insecure No More (Pt. 1-4)

Think insecurity is your problem? Well, actually, it’s just a symptom of the real problem. And when you treat symptoms they may subside for a while, but it’s only a matter of time before you’re overcome again. So what’s the root that needs a pull-up? I talk more about it—and even offer a biblical remedy—in this 4-part miniseries “Insecure No More.”

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[WATCH] Help My Depression (Part 1-4)

Just because they minimize your hurt, doesn’t mean it’s minimal. Just because it wouldn’t impact them the way it’s impacting you, doesn’t mean they’re stronger…or, that it isn’t “that serious.” If it matters to you, it most certainly matters to our Father. He knows, He sees (even the details they don’t), and He understands your hurt and pain fully. Find out what I mean in this video series.

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[VIDEO] Answers For Married Couples: How Do You Work Through the Porn Addiction Of a Spouse?

Watch the first of many questions answered in this new video segment series: Answers For Married Couples, presented by Love-Life, Inc. Eshon Burgundy and Zara Hairston will answer your questions about marriage in 3 mins or less—monthly! Subscribe to the YouTube channel for video notifications, and send questions to: questions@love-life-inc.com for a chance to see you question featured.

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“Help My Unbelief!”

You don’t have to feel condemned, or as though you are betraying God because you presently have doubts where you once stood firm. Confess to your Savior that you need Him to help your unbelief. I talk more about unbelief and the life of the believer in this brief video blog.

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Single Blues? Here’s Some Help!

Time ticks. Days pass. Friends hook up. You? Still single. Even though it’s your choice to remain single, instances occur when you feel disheartened. Those feelings sometimes stir up questions about the future of your life and the length of your singleness. “Is there somebody for me?” “How long before that perfect person comes my way?” Those kinds of thoughts repeat themselves—mostly centered on doubt.

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Can’t Afford Your Wife & Kids? 5 Things That Can Help

Barely keeping up with partially paid bills and piling debts can sometimes invite bull-dog debt collectors—how overwhelming for the loving husband and father. In such situations, it is easy to feel powerless. Some men give up and lose hope while others pursue illegal activity to combat the financial strain, but neither result well. So what does a man do when he is drowning in lack with a family who depends on him to fix it?

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Are You Arguing Too Much?

Couples argue about everything from children and housework to money and sex—even the best marriage counselors and love guru’s have conflict about these same things in their own relationships. Conflict-free relationships do not exist, so it’s no cause for alarm if you and your mate have arguments. The danger, however, is when those arguments become destructive.

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3 Marriage Cycles: Which One Are You In?

If you could only have one what would you choose: love or respect? Research data in Shaunti Feldhahn’s book, “For Women Only,” concludes that most men choose respect while most women prefer love. Ironically, many couples don’t even recognize their spouse’s primary need, and think sex, money or in-law problems keep them from having a good marriage. Emerson and Sarah Eggerichs of Love and Respect Ministries have decoded though, that the state of any marriage has much to do with recognizing certain cycles that involve love and respect.

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“9 Fruits Challenge” – #1, Patience

What fruit of God’s Spirit needs the most work in your heart? Before January of this year, I had not asked the question in that specific manner. Yet, it must have been important to my growth because I found myself in what I coined, “The 9 Fruits Challenge,” before the month was out. I explain further in this video. Hopefully, you will join me in the challenge.

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Extracurricular Participation and Student Engagement

Recent research suggests that participation in extracurricular activities may increase students’ sense of engagement or attachment to their school, and thereby decrease the likelihood of school failure and dropping out (Lamborn et al, 1992; Finn, 1993). If, indeed, participation in extracurricular activities can lead to success in school, then the availability of these activities to students of all backgrounds becomes an important equity issue.

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Out-of-School Activities Play Crucial, Positive Role for Kids

When the school bell rings, do America’s middle and high school students turn into slackers and couch potatoes? Not according to a new national survey which found that 79% of America’s middle and high school students regularly participate in activities both after school and on weekends and 57% have some kind of non-school activity nearly every day. The vast majority of the students surveyed by the nonpartisan opinion research organization Public Agenda indicate that activities ranging from sports to art and music to church programs play a crucial and positive role in their lives.

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Zara Talks About How To Do Right, Weekly Wisdom

I remember when I first came across Romans 7, where Paul talks about the struggle to do right. I’d recently given my life to Christ so my company mostly included Christians who were not so Christian. They typically used Romans 7 as an excuse to sin, like verse 25 of that chapter didn’t exist. However, for me, that verse stood out most for some reason.

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Spice Up Your Marriage: A 7-Day Tip Sheet

Nearly 50 percent of married couples get divorced. A variety of factors contribute to this overwhelming rate, but just one factor can help that rate decline: romance. Romance in a marriage takes communication, concentrated attention and selflessness, all things that can contribute to divorce when taken for granted. Couples can heat up their marriage by getting romantic in simple ways every day, in turn moving them further and further from the possibility of divorce.

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Zara Talks About Cheating Men, In 60 Seconds

You probably hear the popular belief that “all men cheat,” on talk and radio shows, television, and even amongst your peers. As a matter of fact, you yourself might even believe it is true. Whether you think all men cheat, some men cheat, or your views are somewhere in-between, the Bible has key evidence to dispute the popular belief altogether. Listen to this 60-second HeartCheck to find out.

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Zara Answers: “Help, My Mom’s a Control Freak! What Do I Do?”

Young children may have no choice, but adult children do not have to suffer from parental control. Yes, adults must honor their parents, but we should also understand the context of the Biblical commandment; which was not written as a parents ticket to forever control their child.

Amidst failed or repeated attempts to reach a controlling mom, you may not believe in workable solutions to help you better deal with her abuse of control. However, there are a few—and it is up to you to free yourself from the unhealthy burden in a way that respects her position, yet also respects the validity of your adulthood.

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Stuck At Home?

You limit your homeschool experience when you make class exclusive to your home. Homeschooling can offer your students a myriad of educational life experiences, right outside your door. Here’s how…

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Know Your Child’s Learning Type

Most of us have a natural way of picking up new info — we learn best either by listening, looking, or doing. Once you know your child’s learning personality, you can understand how their brain works best. Then, play to their strengths in order to maximize school potential.

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What You Need to Know About Standardized Testing

Since No Child Left Behind in 2001, standardized testing has become increasingly excessive in our school system. The high stakes and high costs have parents and educators wondering if we’re focused too much on testing and not enough on teaching. In 2011, a cheating scandal was exposed involving 178 Atlanta Public Schools’ teachers and principals. While admittedly one of the largest, it was not the first nor the last in response to the increasing pressure placed on schools by standardized tests. So…to test, or not to test? That is the question.

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Homeschooling By the Numbers

Across the United States homeschooling has been overlooked and underrated by many. Diving deeper into student performance and the environments of homeschooling households, it is clear that homeschoolers have risen to the occasion and met the expectations of recruiting Universities and American workforce.

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How American Homeschoolers Measure Up

Once upon a time, all children were homeschooled. But around 150 years ago states started making public school mandatory and homeschooling eventually became illegal. It wasn’t until the 90’s that all states made it legal again. Today, with more than 2 million homeschoolers making up 4% of the school-aged population, it’s the fastest growing form of education in the country.

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Prevent Loneliness: 15 Tips

What exactly makes you lonely? “Lonely,” according to Merriam Webster’s dictionary, is defined as “being company-less, cut off from other people and/or full of bleak-like feelings.” In that case, a definite way to combat loneliness includes doing things that involve others or at least that inspire a sense of inclusion.

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Is Your Engagement Relationship Healthy? Check These 5 Things!

Making it past the single life, through the dating experience, and into an exclusive relationship is almost like nearing a marathon finish line. When marriage is just a step or two away and you have already come so far, it is easy to overlook things figuring you can fix them after the wedding—very unwise. Use the commitment or engagement to fix anything broken because a whole new marathon begins once you get married, and it is the longest one you will ever run.

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Zara Talks About Why It Still Hurts, In 60 Seconds

Does the heartbreak still hurt you? Are you struggling to move on from what occurred due to their betrayal? Sometimes we just bask in our heartbreak, without stopping to ask why we are still hurting. So, why are you hurting after all this time? In this 60-second HeartCheck, find out one reason that could be causing your hurt to stay at a standstill.

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How Healthy Is Your Marriage? Check These 5 Things!

Failing to treat a little finger cut can end up costing you your finger. The same thing applies to marriage. Of course things like physical, verbal or mental abuse show signs of an ailing marriage—but other seemingly small factors put a marriage in that category too. It is always wise to give your marriage a health checkup or evaluation at least yearly to treat and prevent problems from growing out of control.

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Zara Talks About Them Getting Away With Hurting You, In 60 Seconds

Did they get away with hurting you? Maybe you feel betrayed by an ex, while they seem to flaunt their happiness all over social media. Or, perhaps an associate lied on you without penalty. Now, all you can think about is the injustice you feel. Thanks be to God, there is something you can do about it. Find out one option, specifically, in this 60-second HeartCheck.

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Getting a Handle on Love

Love challenges everyone. Whether you’re looking for love as a single or trying to figure out where it went in your marriage, everybody needs help getting a handle on it from time to time.

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Keep the Fire in Your Marriage: 20 Tips

When a physical fire goes out at night it is difficult to see anything clearly. The same holds true when your marriage loses its fire (especially in hard times). Romance cures it and it does not have everything to do with spending money. In fact, most romantic endeavors require no or very little money.

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Zara Talks About Being A “Fool For Love,” In 60 Seconds

We hear all kinds of simple sayings like, “Easy As 1-2-3,” and “Sweet As Pie,” without really investigating their meaning. However, when it comes to terms like “Fool For Love,” we might want to slow down and think about what we are truly saying. Find out why “Fool For Love,” is a bad term, and the reason we should stop using it, in this 60-second HeartCheck.

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Answers: “My Friend Wants More, But I’m Married. What Now?”

Friendship can become burdensome when it leaves a marital bond at stake. Typically, a friend who contributes positively to your friendship, adds to your other relationships too. For instance, the lending ear of a girlfriend might help you better confront your husband about a sensitive issue. However, marriages often get put in the backseat when a spouse gives a less significant relationship priority. Resolve the risks associated with any such friendship in order to maintain your marital covenant.

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4 Tips That Benefit Your Dating Life

Anybody who has ever been on a few dates most likely can share a story about their worst date. This proves that everyone is not appropriate dating material or prepared to date effectively. The point of dating is to use a process of elimination as a means to find or be found by your future spouse (so make it clear to every date that you are entitled to and do date other people). Consequently, you should never go out with someone carelessly.

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Mom, Let Go of Control: Dad Can Help

A mother’s newfound care for her newborn can make it difficult to release control—even to the father. In fact, some fathers feel left out when it comes to the care of a new baby. Because most fathers have compassion for their children, they want opportunities to bond. When dad cannot connect with baby because of mom’s control, he tends to feel rejection. Dad’s transition into a more hands-on paternal role, depends greatly on mom’s release of control.

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“She’s A Better Mom!”

Sometimes we believe the illusion that other moms have it all together—and it can definitely spawn envy. The root of that envy is usually covetousness. When we covet others, we put immense pressure on ourselves to live up to false expectations. We must renew our outlook, focus on our worth, and deal with our doubts to combat covetousness.

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Do Or Don’t?: The Second Pregnancy

Whether a first pregnancy was planned, many new moms make deliberate considerations before the chance of a second pregnancy. Financial considerations and time of space in-between siblings, usually plays a major role in the decision. With money and time factors to consider, a mother may think she can best control the decision. Mom’s who believe God, on the other hand, must recognize who controls their best future.

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Before the Wedding: 10 Tips

If things like prenuptial agreements, dress and tuxedo shopping, or invitations and event planning outweigh a sense of respect for the covenant of marriage, your focus is off. Marriage is too serious a commitment to be downplayed by excitement over the wedding. The wedding is just one day but the marriage is meant to last a lifetime. It is not that the engagement cannot incite celebration—but because engagement precedes marriage, material things never top the list as more important when it comes down to the two.

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Answers: “He Can’t Commit, What Should I Do?”

Men prolong the dating stage more than women, right? Wrong. According to a survey done for Glamour.com by Zoosk.com, 42.1% of the men surveyed said they would make things official after only “a couple of good dates.” So, what might that say about the man you are dating if he cannot commit to you?

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Zara Talks To Relationship Experts Bill & Pam Farrel: Spice Up Your Marriage!

Honeymoon’s start a fire in marriage that is not to be put out by the hands of time. Proverbs 5:17-20 tells husbands to always take delight in their wife’s body, and for wives to satisfy their husband’s with their breasts at all times. Where in the world do people get the idea that the marital spark is meant to flicker out after a while? Oh, right, from “the world.” Well, we Christians must not believe as the world believes—especially when it comes to marriage. I found that top-selling authors Bill and Pam Farrel expressed similar beliefs about marital fire in their book Red Hot Monogamy. Therefore, it was only right to interview them about this very topic.

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New Baby, Changed Relationships

A new baby may change the familiarity of certain relationships. Those relationships can include friends, family members, and even your spouse. It takes work to maintain a relationship up against the adjustments that come with the birth of your newborn. Thankfully, total dependence on God can counter the job.

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Relationship Building for Unmarried Couples

Couples usually pass the most common break-up period after about three to five months, because affections that seem natural earlier on require work to maintain. Relationship-building exercises may be crucial for unmarried couples who have reached the first half-year mark if they want to stay to together. However, exercises specifically designed for building relationships can benefit couples at any time.

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Zara Talks To Relationship Expert Tony Gaskins Jr.: Get The Best Out Of Dating

How do you go from an abusive, controlling, womanizer to a noted relationship and life coach? Tony Gaskins, featured on Oprah and the Tyra Show, can tell you how. He uses his experience to help men and women get to better, healthier love. Because so many people want real love, but don’t know how to date in a way that makes it possible, I asked Tony to call in to HeartShape and share his expert insight on dating with purpose. We talked about the top dating mistakes, cheating versus monogamy and so much more. Of course there’s no blueprint to a perfect dating life, but I have to say, Tony’s tips are pretty close to one.

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