Zara Answers: “Help, My Mom’s a Control Freak! What Do I Do?”

Young children may have no choice, but adult children do not have to suffer from parental control. Yes, adults must honor their parents, but we should also understand the context of the Biblical commandment; which was not written as a parents ticket to forever control their child.

Amidst failed or repeated attempts to reach a controlling mom, you may not believe in workable solutions to help you better deal with her abuse of control. However, there are a few—and it is up to you to free yourself from the unhealthy burden in a way that respects her position, yet also respects the validity of your adulthood.

Mom, Let Go of Control: Dad Can Help

A mother’s newfound care for her newborn can make it difficult to release control—even to the father. In fact, some fathers feel left out when it comes to the care of a new baby. Because most fathers have compassion for their children, they want opportunities to bond. When dad cannot connect with baby because of mom’s control, he tends to feel rejection. Dad’s transition into a more hands-on paternal role, depends greatly on mom’s release of control.

Do Or Don’t?: The Second Pregnancy

Whether a first pregnancy was planned, many new moms make deliberate considerations before the chance of a second pregnancy. Financial considerations and time of space in-between siblings, usually plays a major role in the decision. With money and time factors to consider, a mother may think she can best control the decision. Mom’s who believe God, on the other hand, must recognize who controls their best future.